Kelly is an all american girl. Kelly loves a watermelon. The watermelon is loyal and steadfast. Kelly appreciates this. Her last love was not loyal or steadfast; he was undependable and adulterous. The watermelon wouldn't leave Kelly for that whore of a bartender every other night of the week. The watermelon has eyes for no one, not even Kelly. The watermelon doesn't have eyes.
Kelly and the watermelon do everything together. Who needs friends when you have a watermelon. Friends are deceptive and manipulative. Watermelons are juicy and colorful. At first people looked at Kelly and the watermelon weird, but eventually people stopped asking questions. Her old friends would stare jealously at Kelly and the watermelon whenever the two went out. The watermelon was just so handsome. The watermelon was just so constant. How had Kelly found something so reliable? No one in town was surprised when one week later, Cathy was seen gallivanting with an attractive head of red cabbage.
Kelly's love for the watermelon was unmatched. They moved into together right away. The watermelon was the perfect roommate. Clean and quiet, there were never dirty underwear or empty pizza boxes left unattended by the watermelon. And the watermelon was as reliable with the rent as any watermelon could be expected to be. Kelly appreciates this. Her last roommate was not sanitary or respectful, he was sloppy and rather rude. The watermelon didn't invite strangers over at all times of night to get high and rowdy. The watermelon didn't invite anyone over. It is a watermelon.
One day the watermelon rolled off the kitchen counter. It's red guts spilled across the floor like a rorschach test. Kelly cried for a week straight. The watermelon would be her last love. Kelly spent the rest of her life a lonely spinster. No one could replace the watermelon.
The End
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please hold you applause....its not that good
wow...I don't know what to say.
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